To The Upside Now (Open)

[Riley Spade]

The rain would continue to pour down, curtaining he area- the grey skies glowing as the sun would try to fight through with no avail. She’d listen to him, as he spoke and it seemed even the rain would grow silent for his noble words. Riley would stretch her arms above her head and inhale deeply, enjoying the freshness in the air- everything always smelled so new with rains, even after for like an hour, probably her favorite now that she thought on it, her shining eyes would look to the sky; it was the heaven’s crying on this hard cold world- crying for someone like Raithan no doubt.

Before these years, before it felt like time stopped, she would see such kindness as weakness- it was such a rare encounter for her life was never that simple. Now..however, this world was so bleak and he had no doubt seen the darkness that bred in the corners and crevices, his kindness was so unique it must have been hard to get to that mind set, even harder to keep it. Looking to the fire for the moment as her hands would fall back t her side as she would move towards the wall of the cave, leaning against it as she stared to him now- to most it could be unnerving her gaze- it was ever so intruding as if trying to tear apart a person, trying to figure out any hidden secrets and every one had those in these new times.

“Don’t apologize for your beliefs...ever, or talking- as you said it’s been a while since you had company that can reply back in English.” She would give a soft sigh. “I understand is all.” Watching as he seemed to drift elsewhere in his mind, she would look to the rain enjoying the heat of the fire even from this wall, it had been a long while since she enjoyed this kind of fire- she never made stuff so nice just made it...well she made it be enough for the night or hour or however short period of time it took.

“I was with a group of ..people like us before,but they’re all dead now hopefully but no, after them well, you’re the first so I guess...but you’re also the first not to attack me on sight.” okay so it wasn’t always on sight, but it was mostly behind ill intentions and she had just been reacting properly she wasn’t going to get into that conversation. Blinking suddenly, realizing how dark that might seem even if he had shrugged off everything else before. “You’re not like any of them, at this point in time I wouldn’t want to kill or even fight you.” Oh look, did Riley make a friend?

[Deleted]

It was a long, quiet moment broken only by the crackling of flames before Riley spoke, to reassure him of all things! Certainly whatever he'd expected, it hadn't been that. Most people would either snap back, retreat into sullen silence or just ignore it and shrug it off. He chuckled and shook his head at her reaction and simple reply. "I'm glad someone feels that way. Most don't react the same way." he replied, smiling lightly. As she continued talking, he listened, the emphasis she placed on Hopefully telling him far more than her simple words would about her situation with them. Her reply was somewhat hesistant and rambling, but he felt like he got the gist of it well enough, an attempted social connection, the bonds built through shared stories and trust. Huh. He certainly hadn't expected to make any friends lurking around the outside of the city, so this was a pleasant surprise.

He raised his gaze to meet hers, his own gaze was steady as he responded. "They weren't very nice people, were they?" he asked softly. Meeting her gaze, intuition making connections from her tone and reticence, he recognized a similar darkness in her that many in their world had these days. "I know what it's like," he said hesitantly, his own gaze turning back to the fire, the shame of past events still burning him making him unable to look her in the eye. "I was...maybe five? When everything went to hell. I never knew my parents, was raised as an orphan but in foster care. Most foster kids weren't treated well, but I was young enough to be spared the worst of it I think." he said, lost in his own memories rather than seeing the present. "I remember when the outbreak happened. I...I hid. I could hear the screaming and the gunfire. Sirens wailing everywhere, the stench of the dead and the dying filling the air." he said, voice low, filled with old grief and pain. "I remember hiding in the crawlspace beneath the floor, eyes squeezed shut just...trying to not make a sound as these monsters literally ate everyone I knew and loved alive right above me." he shuddered at the memory, eyes squeezing shut. He spent a moment composing himself, forcing the fear and pain away. "That's when I Snapped. My Allomantic powers woke then, which was the one good thing to come of it, I suppose. I didn't have much power, and it was a lot of experimenting afterward to figure out how it worked, but I had enough. I killed every one of those things that ate my family. I've basically lived alone ever since. When I was a kid, it was just a matter of desperately trying to stay ahead of the people that wanted to kill, eat or experiment on me. You have to grow up fast and hard like that, it's easy to fall in with a bad group and get taken advantage of." he finished quietly, staring absently into the flames.

After another long moment broken only by the sound of the rain hammering down and the crackling of flames, he blinked and smiled tiredly. "Suppose what I'm trying to say is, I get where you're coming from. It's hard, for kids like us to make it. But we did, and here we are now. We're not those same scared, powerless kids anymore. When this world tries to bite, we can bite back." he said with a fierce grin. He was generally a carefree and cavalier individual, but growing up like that left a hardness in people that wouldn't ever really go away. "I've met men like those it sounds like your groups had and I'm sorry that your life took that route Riley. It's no easy thing and it leaves its marks." he said, face softening as he looked at her.

[Riley Spade]

He seemed almost relieved by her words, which was a new one for her she had to admit but it wouldn’t stay long on her mind. It was true, she was sure that most probably wouldn’t agree with his thoughts on shared kindness, maybe even though he was a fool she did sometimes, but she admired him at the same time, to bravely be a fool in this world...did he know it was foolish? Did he care? What if he did actually make a change, Riley could say she doubted him but hoped maybe he had gotten through to her, maybe she would try to preach kindness.. not likely.

Looking to the flames she would look down suddenly, his history stirring up her own memories. She was sure it wasn’t his orphanage, it didn’t like up with the timing and it was zombies. Looking to the flames, she had done the very thing that traumatized him- a sadness would form in her eyes for only a moment he would probably assume it was over his past- and partially he’d be correct. After she had been rescued from the lab, and awakened from whatever induced sleep like coma they had her in, she had been feral- the gang figured the easiest target would be children her age... and the middle of the end of the world brought about a bunch of orphans....she hadn’t regretted that until now, staring at who was once a scared little orphan boy himself.

“My father was a STARs agent and my mother was a nurse, they died protecting me.” Riley spoke up after he shared a bit with her, however that was a lie young Riley didn’t have the best of parents. “I was still bitten however...a lot...it mutated with me and I...just remember waking up to the gang, they were my family.” She could hear them now, their curses to her from the dead- if any survived she was sure they’d go after her well depending on who survived that is.She could hear their words: “Who are you to decide who is good and who is evil.”

Did she deserve their punishment? The next words however, would cause her to laugh and hard- it seemed like it hurt her at first, holding herself as she laughed shaking her head. “Marks? You have no idea.” She’d move her hand towards her shoulder, her shirt was something close to a sleeveless turtleneck, pausing as she tugged at the arm hole of the shirt, tugging it across until he’d see a tattoo of a spade filled in over her heart. “I was told it’s too the bone underneath but I haven’t had the desire to rip my skin off and find out, if you ever heard of the Spade gang- they’re no more.” She’d let her hand fall to her side as the shirt would fall back into place.

[Deleted]

They were both silent for awhile after his confession, though he couldn't say what caused her silence. For himself, it was old memories and pains reawoken. Even now, to this day, he wasn't sure he was fully free of them. He felt he could still hear the wet sounds of flesh being chewed, the hungry, warbling moans throughout the buildings he'd hide in, night after night. The terror that his hunger of all things would betray him from a stomach rumbling at the wrong moment, alerting the monsters to him. He looked back to her, noting the sadness in her eyes. A response to his own experiences? Perhaps, though she didn't strike him as the type who would sympathize with anothers horrible experience. Most likely her own memories of growing up. He sighed, rubbing a hand across his eyes as he looked back to the rain. He kept them closed for a moment, composing himself and walling off the memories and emotions that came with it once more. Another moment and he dropped his hand, eyes and features firm and resolved once more. He refused to let the past hold him back and define him, it was only the choices he made now and in the future that would matter. Hesitating for a moment, he pulled out a small gold nugget from one of the small pouches he kept to hold various metal bits for his abilities. He rolled it idly between his fingers, considering it as Riley started talking.

He looked to her as she explained about her own parents and what had happened to her. "I'm sorry, it's a terrible thing to experience." he said softly. He knew of the STARS group by reputation and theirs was certainly formidable, if somewhat inglorious after their collusion with Umbrella, though he felt confident not all had been dirty. In fact, he was fairly certain he'd heard it was primarily through the actions of the STARS Alpha and Bravo teams from right here in Raccoon City that Umbrellas actions had been uncovered, and ultimately resulted in their downfall. As she lost herself in laughter, he half rose in alarm, for it seemed the hold the faint edge of hysteria. She revealed the mark on her chest and he frowned, the name tugging at his memory. He didn't know much about the gang, only that they operated out of the Wasteland and had had a pretty harsh reputation. He'd been lucky to never cross paths with them before. He wasn't sure it was a fight he'd have wanted, though from what he gathered just from his brief conversation with Riley, he would've been hardpressed to turn a blind eye and let them walk away.

"I know of em by reputation mostly. Never crossed paths. Can't say as I'm sorry to hear they're gone." he said, shaking his head as she resumed her former posture. He smiled lightly at her after a moment. "First rule of the Wastes, the more alone you are, the more you need a partner to watch your back." he recited, one of the little bits of wisdom he'd gained over the years. He met her eyes for a moment and grinned, "Truth be told Riley, I'd be happy to be your partner if you're even half as skilled as I think you are." he said, causing Midnight to raise his head and nicker out something, bobbing his head up and down, which caused Raithan to laugh. "Right, that is to say, we'd be happy to be your partners." he corrected himself while Midnight chuffed agreeance, crimson orbs levelled at the woman. "He's warming up, like I said. Mostly I think he's just saying that to make sure he keeps an eye on me." he added in a stage whisper, grinning lightly.

[Riley Spade]

“I guess, I don’t really remember much of it though...you know being human.” Riley had remembered bits and pieces of her past, blurry faces and blinding lights- repetitive beeping...truth be told, Riley hadn’t known who took her, or what exactly they did to her all she knew was she was no longer human the moment she was bitten into, she couldn’t blame the doctors and scientist who were simply doing their jobs, for all she knew they stabilized her, for all she knew they were the reason she was this way- she didn’t like to dwell on the unknown too long. As he spoke again she’d pause for a moment- as if a deer in the head lights at his offer- at their offer.

Going quiet once more at this, her eyes would fall on his hands as he seemed to play with a shiny rock reflecting off her own eyes as she would slowly turn to face the horse, this would be the first time she had placed her back fully to him that act in itself caused her entire senses to go crazy, her body wanted to overturn her mind and keep an eye on Raithan- after all this could be apart of his plans, to get her trust and kill her...her trust wasn’t something easily won- her eyes hard on the horse, her fingers itching to grab at her blades and throw it at him- for him to reveal his true nature and attack now. From what he could see her back would have plenty of scars on it, mostly scars- he’d be able to identify some as bullet wounds in spots that would probably kill the average human along with many other warrior’s marks.

“I’ve done so much wrong in my time, I don’t even know if I have enemies. I’ve devoured humans, zombies and BOWs alike, i’ve murdered without thought and regret- murdered people to this day I don’t even know who...or why, what they could have done to receive Sage’s wrath, for me to deliver it.” Her words were cold, and as sharp as the blades hidden on her.She’d allow a few moments to pass.”I never experienced regret before you..while we are being honest....my.” she’d turned to him, maybe it was the fact he had shown her some sort of kindness that wasn’t masked by fear. “My first time with the Spade Gang, they freed me... and set my hunger upon an orphanage. I devoured everythin- everyone in sight.” Her eyes would narrow onto him as her lips would form a tight frown.

“If you want me as a partner still then you’re blind, and I am a fool because I ...” she’d go quiet as her eyes would drop to the ground for only a moment. “...Wouldn’t mind the company.” these words would be very small compared to the sharp words from earlier.

[Deleted]

He nodded in agreeance, tracing his fingers along the bracers on his arm. Made of many metals, they represented one of the strongest portions of his powers. "Not always humans forget. I'm better at it than most." he said, hesitating for a minute before continuing. "Allomancy isn't the full extent of my powers. One of them, using copper, can allow me to store memories." he said softly. "I put all those old memories away many many years ago. All that's left are vague impressions of the powerful emotions I felt at the time. Terror, pain, despair. I think, over the years, my mind has conjured imagined memories to go with them. It's all...formless, shapeless shadows in my head rather than clear, distinct images. I put all the clear ones away and never brought them back out so I don't have to live with it weighing me down." he said, feeling like a coward. He never had garnered the courage to face those old demons of his and conquer them and he doubted he ever would.

He looked back up as she began her confession, eyes hardening as his fingers tightened around the gold in his hands. She confessed to being the monster to devour people like those he'd loved and held dear, once upon a time. His breath caught in his throat and he looked sharply away. His fingers twitched as his instincts were to go for his guns and blast away. As she finished her confession, silence fell on the camp. He remained that way for several moments before looking back at her. He looked at her, long and hard as Midnight equally regarded Raithan to see what he would do. Eventually, his features softened and he sighed. "Well. That's a mighty large piece of truth to chew over." he paused, considering his wording before continuing. "I'll be honest, I've a powerful rage after that revelation of yours, no mistaking it. The fact that there are people out there who would treat children like nothing more than weapons is absolutely infuriating to me." he said through a tone of forced calm. "I don't hold any of it against you Riley, how could I? You couldn't have known any better, driven by instincts and hungers you had no hope of controlling without either a lot of help or a lot more experience." he added, softening his tone as the anger began to drain out of him. It was a helpless feeling that he hated as he looked at someone, scarred and cracked from the events she had been forced to endure. He hated seeing that in other people and hated that he felt powerless to do anything about it. "I tell you truly Riley, I'll be your partner for as long as you'll have me. Whenever you need a hand, be it for fighting or talking, you can call on us." he said, giving her a grin as he made his promise to her. Maybe with someone else in her life, she wouldn't lost like he'd been for so long before he'd met Midnight.

[Riley Spade]

Allomancy.. was he considered a BOW, or just an altered human...was there even a difference, it all meant to do one thing; separate humanoids. It’s something she’d have too keep in mind to look into, or maybe even ask him about it once the two got a bit more comfortable with each other. So, he could forget the event but not the emotions of the event, she admired and even to an extent was jealous of his cowardice; to be able to forget the main visual affects, she wondered if his nightmares were any different than hers. It would make sense, the mind was an expert at crafting loopholes from insanity, no doubt any mind would break with enough damage to it, just like in dreams she was sure his mind filled in the blank- there was no true escape from memories in the end.

If he thought that was a hard piece to chew, he should try a rotting leg some time.

It came to no surprise that he was angry, after all what are the chances of them having a similar past- just different roles- he had been a victim in his past and she had been the very monster that haunted said nightmares; the world may be over but it still had a shit taste of humor. Anyone would be angry, and she was fully prepared to react, her body tense and her senses open despite the overwhelming “freshness” in the air she’d try to smell past it, even able to smell the earthy scent that had over powered his own natural one. His words, she wasn’t surprised- she had killed innocents and it took her entire life to even feel bad for it. This world was cruel and often the best response to this cruel world, was to be even harsher- the next part wasn’t even surprising to her.. but it still held a bit of shock to her- after all he didn’t blame her for her actions; But he blamed Sage and the Spade gang. Riley doubted her victims felt the same way, and asides from the orphanage- the victim’s families....but at least someone didn’t blame her.

Turning to him as he spoke, and she’d nod her head silent. What was this feeling she felt in her stomach? She wasn’t sure, she almost felt sick in a funny way. “If you’re still willing to be my partner- both of you, after that, then I don’t think anything else that gets thrown at you will be taken as hard- I can’t promise you safety I don’t know what it means to be in my life, but I will do my best to make sure you two won’t die.” Or drown under all the bullshit that could follow her, her luck wasn’t the best but karma was a bitch to someone like her.

[Deleted]

He smiled tiredly at her in reply. "Don't worry about it so much Riley. We're all adults here who make our own choices. We know going into it that things are risky, how could they be anything but these days? If we get hurt or die, well, we accept that's the risk of doing business. Otherwise we'd just find a hole to crawl into and pull it in after us." he said with a chuckle. "Either way, anything happens to us, we won't be seeing it as your fault or responsibility. We look out for each other best we can and we should be fine." he added, turning his attention back to the rain before yawning and stretching. It had been a bit of a rollercoaster conversation and he felt fairly confident the excitement was only just beginning for them all. It was starting to look more and more like coming to Raccoon was the right idea, it was certainly shaping up to be more interesting than just wandering the same barren and ruined places again and again.

He smiled lightly to himself as he settled back, relaxing a bit finally. Part of him couldn't help but consider the fact that she might be trying to set him up to betray him. String him along until she got hungry enough to just devour him in his sleep. He dismissed the thoughts easily however, she felt too genuine to be planning anything like that, though he'd been wrong before so it wouldn't hurt to remain at least a little cautious. But then, the last time he'd spent any length of time actually chatting with someone was about five years back, in New York before everything went to hell again so he might not be the best judge at this point. He grabbed another log and added it to the fire as he was sitting there, stirring it up to keep the fire going strong. He spent a moment making sure it was good before settling back again, holding his hands towards the fire to keep them warm. There was a bit of a chill in the air that he attributed to just being in the mountains, and he enjoyed the warmth the crackling flames brought. "So Riley. You said earlier that whatevers behind your nightmares is in the city. What is it you're looking to find exactly? Most folks I know don't exactly go looking for trouble, let alone wander where they know troubles gonna be and might have a grudge against them." he asked lightly, glancing back her way. It was gonna take a lot of sitting and thinking to puzzle this all out and he'd feel a lot better having all the pieces he needed on hand first. If he was gonna be helping her, seemed prudent to know what exactly it was she was looking to pick a fight with.

[Riley Spade]

It was good for Raithan to be on his feet around Riley, because he’d eventually find out that while mostly having good intentions, well everyone’s upbringing can always leave an imprint- even if they think they unlearn it especially since she had only just begun her journey to unlearning, she’d have to be more alert on her feedings now- she didn’t want to go feral on him and she didn’t think now would be the best time to explain herself to him after all he just had a hard time chewing that small portion of her child hood. Golden eyes would fixate on the dancing flame before them, as if the sound of the rain had been the only kind of music each of the embers needed, they’d spark and crackle against her reflective orbs.

Just like that, she would shrug her shoulders.

“It’s where my feet have taken me, I ... don’t have much memories besides my time in the gang...I don’t remember my humanity.” Her eyes would fall onto her hands, while gloved it was almost as if the blood she had on her hands would seep through the dark black fabric. Maybe she wanted her humanity back, would that even be possible... to feel and be human once more, did she truly want that? No...she didn’t think so, “I remember the labs though, the experiments vaguely..” did she mutate naturally... or did they create her... or maybe it was a bit of both. Such a lonely road, she had traveled so far- with no name for an ending destination. There was a certain freedom that rain had.. she’d take a few steps back towards the entrance- trying to get used to showing her back and letting her guard down even for a few seconds.

Her hands would outstretch and she’d allow the downpour to hit the palms of her hands, feeling the warmth of the heat behind her. “The only one who had any idea of my past, is probably dead- and if he isn’t, there’s no telling if i’d get the honest and whole truth from someone like him.” The pain he had left her, would define her almost as if it had been a chisel. “It might not be in Raccoon city, but... I figure if anyone would know about the labs or even who I was... they’d be here- if they are even still alive.”

It could be something of a wild goose chase, maybe the destination led to a dead end.. maybe it would lead to her end- but all she knew was if she didn’t do anything, she wouldn’t find shit; she wasn’t going to live a blank slate, even if she had become the very lap dog that Sage had trained her to be, how could she continue.. how could she form any connections, if she didn’t know what she was, it felt like her life was simply on loop for eternity, despite every day being different; it would never leave her mind who or what she was, what was she meant to be? Maybe this was it, maybe she was just a killer, meant to devour those like a hungry beasts, of course she would never know. The silver haired killer knew this much, she’d never be a lap dog again; even if it meant being a killer- she’d kill whoever she deemed was worthy. These thoughts were annoying, give me a break.

A deep growling could be heard now, by deep I mean guttural and by growling I meant her stomach was loud enough to leave an echo in their cave. Cupping her hands to the rain she’d take a small sip out of them, knowing it wouldn’t satiate her hunger but it was something that she could drink. If she wanted to successfully protect her new partners she’d have to be at her full strength, even though her senses screamed at her to not invest her time in this foolish partnership. They’d die or betray her, or she’d betray them no doubt, even if that hadn’t been her plan currently sometimes life had other plans, what a cruel and wicked life.



Turning to him with a sigh, before turning to him and looking to Shadow, “I’ll announce to you when I return, if you leave in a rush don’t worry about me, after all not many people smell like a walking mine.” She spoke with a smile, before stretching out her arms and back- the cracking sound of her bones would match the crackling of the flames, before taking another step forward allowing herself to step out of the cave, before taking another step forward and running off. The only sound being the soft sound of the wind against their traps. She had to eat, she wasn’t going to risk taking out her first good conversation in years; probably her life time if she hadn’t at one point in time idolized Sage because she was hungry.